I have been a therapist for 19 years, and I am writing this article about supervision, hoping to shine some light on the role it plays in our profession. Since I started training, I have been told that supervision is a valuable asset to your career; it will help shape you into a great counsellor. It is supposed to be your safe port, a place where you can go deep. After all, a client can only go as far as you are willing to go, right?
Why it didn’t work for me
Well, it did not work for me! Or rather, for a very long time, it wasn’t a good experience. It was purely a “tick the box” activity to fulfil my professional body’s requirements. Why didn’t it work for me for so long? As a counsellor, I have done a lot of self-discovery and developed strong self-awareness. Ultimately, this isn’t about finger-pointing but self-reflection! And yet, there is a saying: it takes two to tango. So, why did my supervisory relationships not work out?
A trip down memory lane
Looking back: when I was doing my training and started my placement, I was receiving group supervision through the placement alongside individual supervision (which I paid for myself). The group supervision sessions were too short, and there were too many students, so I felt like I never had enough time to speak. My one-to-one sessions were just okay-ish. I guess I was looking for someone to guide me through the basics. Where do I put the clock in the room? Does the client need to see it too? I also needed encouragement to trust my supervisor, rather than being intimidated by the authority figure. I was young, 30 years old, just like my colleagues, and my supervisor seemed like a highly “mature” figure to me. Consequently, I didn’t feel safe enough to open up in the group or in one-to-one sessions for fear of being criticised, judged, or even (my worst fear) reported to my professional body.
A strange encounter in a clinical setting
Once qualified, I went to work in a clinical setting and had to find my own supervisor again. I did, and the experience was pretty strange. I remember booking my first session, arriving at the address, and ringing the doorbell. A voice through the intercom said, “Come in.” I opened the door, but there wasn’t a soul in sight. I waited, seeing no one, until I heard a voice call from upstairs, “Come up.” I walked upstairs and saw three rooms, two closed, one open. I peeked in and saw two chairs and a coffee table. I assumed this was the supervision room, but still, no one was there. As I stood waiting, the supervisor finally came down from the floor above. We shook hands and went into the room, but by then, I was already checked out! I felt completely closed off, and the whole situation felt weird. We did our 1.5-hour session, and that was it. The supervisor got up from the chair and said, “Thank you. You can go now”, before heading right back upstairs. I was left standing there thinking, what do I do now? Should I leave? Should I go downstairs and make myself a cup of tea? Of course, I didn’t go back!
How our needs change as we grow
About five to eight years into my career, I started feeling more confident in my work as a counsellor and clearer about what I needed from supervision. However, I still found it hard to feel completely at ease with my supervisor at the time. What I have learned is that as we grow as therapists, our relationship with our supervisor needs to change and grow alongside us.
- At the start: we need guidance, psychoeducation, structure, and security.
- In the middle: we need more openness, flexibility, and room for reflective thinking.
- At the mature stage (which for me is now my 19th year of practice): we need to find a colleague we can respect and value, someone who gives us plenty of space to be open and reflective and who truly sees us as a peer.
But what if the first few years of your career are marked by bad experiences? Surely I wasn’t the only one who struggled to trust the process or feel safe. What could I have done better? More importantly, what could those seasoned supervisors have done to help me feel safe, unjudged, and invited to challenge my own thoughts and processes?
Creating a real safe space
I returned to my studies a few years ago and am now a qualified supervisor myself. I love it! My mission has been to create the safest space possible, a place where my supervisees can be completely honest with themselves in the room with me.
I often hear my supervisees say incredibly candid things:
- “I don’t like working with this client.”
- “I feel a strong energy in the room; I fancy him/her.”
- “My client is boring; I don’t enjoy working with them.”
- “What they bring to the room hits too close to home; it makes me feel uncomfortable.”
- “I am impatient; I want them to progress faster (in just three sessions).”
I absolutely love those statements! Back then, I couldn’t, wouldn’t, and didn’t dare to be so candid with my own supervisors. Hearing those words makes me feel incredibly happy and proud. My supervisees are human and imperfect, yet they feel safe enough to be completely themselves in the room with me. That’s exactly what a supervisor is for: creating a safe space for your supervisees to be authentic, rather than just “ticking a box” to satisfy a professional requirement.
Questions about supervision
What is clinical supervision, and why is it required?
Clinical supervision is regular, structured time with an experienced practitioner where a therapist reflects on their client work. Professional bodies require it to protect clients and support the therapist’s practice. At its best it is far more than a compliance exercise. It is a space to think honestly about what happens in the room, including the parts that are uncomfortable to admit.
Why might supervision not feel helpful?
Often it comes down to safety. If you don’t feel able to be honest for fear of being judged, criticised, or reported, supervision becomes a box to tick rather than a place to grow. Poor fit, a supervisor who feels like an authority figure rather than a colleague, sessions that are too short or too crowded, and your own stage of development can all play a part. It genuinely takes two, and the relationship matters as much as the supervisor’s expertise.
How do I know if a supervisor is right for me?
Notice how you feel in the room and afterwards. Can you say the difficult things: that you dislike a client, feel attracted to one, or find another boring? A good supervisor makes candour possible rather than risky. If you leave sessions feeling closed off or on guard, that is information. It is reasonable to try someone else. The right fit will also shift over your career, so a supervisor who suited you at qualification may not be the one you need years later.
How should supervision change as I gain experience?
Early on you need guidance, structure, and reassurance. In the middle years you need more openness and room for reflective thinking. As you mature, you need a peer you respect, someone who gives you space to be open and treats you as a colleague. When supervision stays fixed while you keep growing, it stops fitting, and that mismatch is worth naming rather than tolerating.
By Edoardo Zollo. View profile.
